Even though I am out of the crazy mans house I feel responsible for him... why do I feel that way? I want to go on with my life and I feel I will just be stuck here.
I met a really nice guy who is into me; he's 5 years older than I am and he's secure and has his life together. He was raised well by his parents and wants to take me out to dinner. Please God, don't let the damage I have sustained show, just let it heal.. the scars shouldn't show too much. I dream of a normal guy and a normal life... it that too much to ask for? (He's handsome & 6' 3" tall, built well.... kind, respectful... and he called me smart... heavy sigh) He is really good for my ego.
Its kind of funny how my brain works to protect me. In a blink of an eye I had already worked out that this nice guy spent time with me, found me lacking and not worth the effort and was gone.... all before I have even gone out to dinner with him. Well... since it can't get any worse than that I will just relax and have a good time... pray for me... I haven't been out on a "date" in... eeegads... eons... I began dating that other guy in 1996... Crazy man and I didn't really date... (unless you want to call going out to dinner last week a date... where he forgot to bring money so we couldn't go to the movies?) we just moved in together... bad move; in defense of my actions it was only supposed to be temporary, I wasn't supposed to marry him. I probabloy wouldn't have if I wouldn't have been bullied so.
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